It’s the 4th of July in the US. BBQ’s, fireworks, and festivities. Eating too much, hanging out and celebrating. But it means so much more to me. How about you?
You see, I’m a transplant. I’m a long way from South Africa, where I was born and lived until I was 30. Through a variety of circumstances, I now find myself living in Seattle, officially a US citizen. And, I am so thankful.
There is a lot of dissension in the US. Ironically, differences seems to have become such a focus at a time when there’s never been more talk about acceptance. I hear laments about the sad state of current affairs and the bleak prospects for the future. I understand that everything is relative. We should never dismiss the perspective of another simply because it differs from ours. However, from my perspective, I never stop having a heart filled with hope and thankfulness that I get to live in this absolutely wonderful country. It’s not perfect, no, but to me it is quite exceptional in a whole bunch of ways.
But, I have to tell you, leaving your home country is not easy. There are enormous sacrifices and hard choices you make along the way. The homesickness for family and the familiar coupled with building a new community are challenging. Then there’s the financial cost, the career impact and learning new ways. You basically start all over again. Times will come when you wonder if it’s worth it and if you made the right choice. To persevere, you need to be clear on why you’re doing it. This is what keeps my heart thankful to be in the US, regardless of what might be happening in the news.
So, why am I thankful to live in the US? Here are my top 3 reasons.
#1: Freedom – literally!
For many, it may seem like no big deal to have your kids play alone outside in the culdesac without worry. For me, it’s pure joy. This is probably one of the most meaningful things. If having my kids enjoy a sense of safety and freedom where we live was the only benefit, every sacrifice I’ve made would’ve been worth it. But there’s so much more. I can go running, alone and at night, without looking over my shoulder. I don’t cling to my purse when I’m out and carefully wrap it around my leg when I sit down at a restaurant. I can drive wherever I please, whenever I please. If I have the misfortune that my car breaks down en route, the worst that happens is that I’m delayed and inconvenienced. It’s not like this everywhere. And when you have the freedom the US offers when you once did not, you appreciate it in a way that is hard to explain.
I grew up in South Africa. A beautiful country, filled with a truly vibrant mixture of cultures, energy and people. There is so much that I love about it and I wish it had never come to me feeling the need, or desire, to leave. However, it is fraught with challenges and safety and a lack of freedom are right up there at the top of the list.
I was a teenager during the 80’s when the tension and violence escalated. Entering a shopping center was like going through TSA at the airport. In any public place, you were constantly on guard for suspicious, abandoned packages. At school we were regularly instructed on how to spot a limpet mine and other explosive devices. Bomb blasts were not uncommon and we we had one detonate in my high school in 1985. In my class room. Fortunately (if there is such a thing in these cases) it exploded the night before during installation and killed two of the perpetrators.
Change in South Africa was necessary and it came in 1994. Sadly, it wasn’t accompanied by an improvement in safety for the average person. Rape, car hijackings, brutal attacks and murder are daily threats and realities you live with in South Africa. Imagine having your car break down or run out of gas where this represents the fine line between life and death. You may think this is melodramatic but it’s not. Just recently, two young kids ran out of gas and were murdered on the side of the road, waiting for the father to bring gas. This, and worse, happens all the time.
Houses are hidden behind big walls, electronic gates, burglar bars on all the windows and doors, alarm systems and “eina-ivy” (aka barbed wire). It makes little difference other than to force criminals to be more creative and bold with their tactics. These days, driving up to your gate and waiting for it to open is one of the most dangerous times for a potential car hijacking. For those who aren’t sure what this is, typically it involves the criminals stealing the vehicle and either forcing the driver from the vehicle at gunpoint or killing them on the spot. Even worse, sometimes they force the driver to go with them which, almost always, ends in a far worse fate than any of the other options.
Living in South Africa tends to make you adaptable, resilient, resourceful and hard working because things don’t come easy. These are very positive attributes and one of the reasons that South Africans tend to do well when they land on foreign shores. South Africa is woven tightly into the fabric of who I am. It always will be. But living in the US has given me a sense of freedom of daily movement, for both me and my children. I deeply value this and appreciate it with all my heart.
My girlie, Noelle, a few years ago having fun during our July 4th celebrations in our culdesac 😍
#2: Opportunity – in the broadest sense of the word
Opportunity is a wonderful word. It’s uncontained. Limitless. Possible. That’s what America is to me. Coming from The Bluff in Durban, South Africa, America was so far removed from me that it might as well have been on the moon. For some reason, from when I was a very little girl, I’d regularly tell my mom, “I want to live in America!” The Archie comics might have had something to do with it and within their pages, the ads to order live Sea Monkeys and eat delicious Twinkies seemed so very wonderful. For many years my greatest dream was to get married in Disneyland. Haha! How living in the States would ever be possible for me was beyond comprehension. It seemed impossible. But it wasn’t and here I am.
America has been very good to me. I didn’t go to a top college. I didn’t have a lengthy pedigree of prestigious firms on my resume. But through hard work, persistence, consistency and being determined to do the very best job I could in every circumstance, opportunities have come my way. I have a very good job, working for a company that makes the world a better, healthier place and best of all, I get to work with some of the most wonderful people ever.
Living here, I don’t feel limited by who I am or what I have currently. There’s always a sense of the abundant possibilities. The opportunities. Even better, I feel that my kids have opportunities well beyond anything that might have been available to them in South Africa or elsewhere. Not to say that you can’t have success elsewhere because, of course, you can. But the States has given me a life that is well beyond what I could have hoped for and I’m so deeply thankful.
#3: Quality – of life, adventure and everything inbetween
Aside from growing up in South Africa, I’ve lived in London, UK, as well as Vancouver, Canada. I’ve also been fortunate to have traveled around the world extensively. I’ve experienced the beauty of the South Island of New Zealand, the vibrancy of life in the Italian Dolomites, the adventure of the Himalayas in Nepal and the down to earth living in Australia. I’ve also sampled the mundane aspects of living in different countries, including the health care, cost of living, housing and everything inbetween.
I can say, without hesitation, if I could choose to live anywhere, I’d choose… America. Every time.
It’s a country with a hugely diverse range of experiences and adventures. Just two summers ago, my family did a two week roadtrip. We packed up the minivan with myself, my husband, two kids, grandma and all our piles of stuff and traveled 4000 miles. We got to visit everything from Yellowstone to The Grand Canyon, Zion, Yosemite, Las Vegas, San Francisco, the Oregon coast and so many places inbetween. It was a little crazy in hindsight but I love that we have these options. And when we come home, we return to our little house on our little street in our little culdesac. It’s safe, it’s comfy and it has all we need. I’m thankful.
My kids go to great public schools that are less than a 1/2 mile away and can safely walk home from school if necessary. When we’re sick, we have world class healthcare available. Drivers on the road are considerate and everyone follows the rules at 4-way stops. That doesn’t happen in some parts of the world like South Africa where a 4-stop turns into a free for all and it’s survival of the quickest.
The States isn’t perfect. I get it. I’m not naively living in my own little bubble thinking that everyone else’s experience is the same as mine. I know there are hardships. I’ve experienced them too. But, for me, coming from the background and experiences I’ve had, this country has been so good to me and my family. I don’t take this for granted. I don’t feel entitled to it. I feel humbled by it and eternally grateful that, for whatever reason, God has directed my life to bring me here.
My hope is that I will use this opportunity not only to serve myself and my family but to serve others. And, that truly is the American way.
